My Dogs are Mooing

Last night was Trivia Night.  We gifted folk put together a crack team named Potpourri for 300; there were several team names dedicated to Dick Clark (too soon?) and even one dedicated to those enterprising young lads guarding the President in Colombia.  We started strong in the General Knowledge category, although the team failed to believe me when I said Harare is the capital of Zimbabwe.  Hey, I teach this stuff; I've got a database of every country in the world to prove it!  We came back in a big way with knowledge of Scientists Everyone Should Know -- we did, indeed, know most of them.  This week's Speed Round was drawing car logos.  Since we had an artist and an architect on our team, we were set. We were hanging strong in third until the emcees dropped the bombshell (or Deringer) -- the next category was about the assassination of Abraham Lincoln.  What????  Didn't he just, like, get shot? How were they going to pull ten questions out of that?  Apparently, the de

After school I convinced myself to go to the gym.  So, naturally, I found myself getting a pedicure instead.  I was relaxing with my tootsies in the warm bubbly water when the woman across from me got a phone call.  She was clearly a model of etiquette because she took the call without hesitation or concern for the rest of us.  You could tell by the loud tone of her voice that she was initially confused; the caller was apparently a Verizon representative and had asked for her husband.  After a few moments she responded that she would stop by Verizon as soon as possible to discuss the matter because she, frankly, had no idea what the caller was talking about.  Hmmmm, a secret phone?  A number she didn't recognize?  Inconsistencies in the bill?  Maybe this guy is having a mid-life crisis.  Considering how much this lady talked (even when she wasn't on the phone) while I was trying to enjoy my foot massage maybe he's just fed up.  Maybe he's got a little somethin' some

My parents are in the market for a new kitchen table (moment of silence for the old one).  Their search took them to Furniture Row, and they managed to narrow it down to three choices.  Since they tend to agree on very little, they asked me to come and offer some input.  We went to the first store and were pleasantly surprised to discover the table marked down from the day before.  The second option was quickly dismissed, leaving us with the third option at the place next door -- which turned out to be the exact same table but at a higher price.  Hmmmm, what to do? The obvious choice was to return to the first store and buy the table at the lower price. However, the second store agreed to do a price match -- with the caveat that we provide proof of the lower price.  How were we supposed to do that without looking like total fluffernuts?  Why not return to the first store and just make the purchase there?  That's when the back and forth began:  we said something, the salesguy went