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Maybe...

It's been far too long since my last post.  I thought about writing several times, but my brain had other plans.  A lot has happened recently, and my mind has definitely been all over the place.   A new nephew.  Changes at work.  Returning to school for another master's degree.  A fender bender.  Meeting a celebrity.  And that's just the beginning...

My life has certainly maintained its roller-coaster tendency. Some days the ride is exhilarating, and other days I wish I'd never even entered the amusement park.  I suppose that's natural though; the road not taken, indeed.  If you had asked me a year ago where I'd be, I never figured I'd be here -- whatever here means.  The impact of changing one part of my life has bled into the other areas, and taking on a new role as a student has me examining all of the other roles of my life in a different way.  My instructors have repeatedly talked about keeping life in balance and not letting work override everything else.  It's one thing to balance, but it's another thing to do it with the weight of the world on your shoulders.

Maybe I take on too much.  Maybe I don't take on enough.  My mother would tell you I don't need anything else on my calendar, but maybe I'm just adding the wrong things to my calendar.  Maybe I thrive under pressure, or maybe I just haven't reached the point yet where I buckle.  Maybe I've been buckling the whole time and haven't realized it because I don't know what the alternative feels like.  Maybe, maybe, maybe.

It's the maybes that keep me going, I suppose.  They can drag me down, but they can also propel me forward.  Maybe I don't really like roller coasters, but I won't know until I try.  So maybe I don't get out of line just yet and see what happens...


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